The Epistles of Rob

Ethics

2011-03-31T10:05:00.001-06:00

I am serving as a missionary in the Philippines. My trainer has taught me well and has shown me a wonderful example of an obedient missionary. I find out on Monday that in two days he will be transferring and I will be companions with an Elder to whom obedience is not priority, and I’m faced with the choice: Do I stay strong and true to the example my trainer set for me, or do I become complacent and go along with my new companion’s disobedience?
Regrettably, I made the wrong decision and chose disobedience, but thankfully that decision was short lived.
In my life leading up to this moment, serving a mission was a difficult decision for me. I was not sure if I could do it. I didn’t know if I could be that good. In the MTC and with my trainer in the field I was very obedient, but more out of necessity. The blessings and the Spirit were obviously placed in my life in the largest measure I had known in my life, yet I still was not sure if all that obedience is what I wanted. In the moment, my obedience was blind.
The major ethical issue in place here is my attitude toward covenants I made with God at the time I accepted my mission call to give two years of my life to Him and obey His standards, not giving up a minute. At the moment I had to ask myself, “How do I view my mission? How important is this time to me? How important is my time to God?” It was an obvious choice of right vs. wrong and the choice would reflect my devotion and the platform of testimony and faith I currently stood on.
I was one of the biggest stakeholders in this dilemma. The choice I made here would have an everlasting effect on my life and how I remembered my mission thereafter. How would this decision affect my testimony? How would it affect the rest of my mission? What affect could this decision have had on my salvation? However, it was not just my salvation at stake here. My decision could greatly affect my companion, the ward members, my investigators, everybody living in the area, and even go as far as affecting my future children.
The potential consequences for myself and others are monumental in this decision. For myself, it could have meant either a strengthened testimony and resolve to live the commandments for the rest of my life or an attitude that I am higher than the rules and don’t need to keep the commandments to remain happy. It could have fortified me against the temptations of the devil forever or make me weak and vulnerable, ruining the rest of my mission and potentially my salvation. My companion had the potential to see my example of obedience and change his attitude toward the mission rules, helping him to strengthen his testimony and get back on the right path. However, I chose wrong and it solidified him more in his ways and he continued in disobedience for the rest of his mission. Because of our disobedience trust from the members was lost. If we had chosen to work hard and be obedient, trust would have been strengthened and the testimony of members could have been strengthened and they could have been more inspired to share the gospel with their friends. Had I continued in my disobedience, I could have affected the missions of every one of my companions thereafter, including any other missionary I had influence over, possibly influencing them to follow me in disobedience. That being the case, not only my investigators would have been affected, but the investigators of every missionary that I had influenced. The salvation and conversion of investigators and converts would have been in serious jeopardy, whereas if I had chosen obedience, the investigators would have a better chance at feeling the Spirit from us and experiencing the full conversion process. The consequences of my decision could even impact the lives of my future children. If they were to ever ask about my dedication to the Lord’s work and my testimony of obedience, I couldn’t answer them honestly that I was a good missionary. That kind of response could have devastating effects on the testimonies of my children and their desires to serve the Lord. Based off of the consequentialist theories, I chose the wrong path. My decision, had it been carried on for longer than a couple of weeks, would have only had devastating results on everyone around me. To make the decision the consequentialist theory suggests would have been to remain obedient and help my companion to do so as well.
My chief obligation in this situation is to my Heavenly Father. By choosing the path of disobedience here I toss aside covenants I made with the Lord when I accepted my mission call as well as at the time of baptism. Doing so will lose the Lord’s confidence in me and result in a loss of the Spirit as well. My second obligation is to the wonderful Filipinos that I served. I needed to be choosing obedience in order for me to have the Spirit and the guidance essential for inviting them to come unto Christ. Without the strength of my obedience, the people in my area of responsibility were relying upon my own personal ability to teach the gospel. If I had my obligations in clear view when faced with this decision, I would have chosen obedience.
When considering the Mormon community I was born and raised in and the nature of the work I was doing. I definitely made the wrong decision. If my decision and following actions were published or made public I would have been humiliated and probably would have run off to hide and become a hermit. The things I did were in secret and I was ashamed of them. I would have lost any respect that my fellow missionaries had for me if they knew what I was doing. If I had been called to a leadership position in my disobedience I would have had no moral authority, and other missionaries were bound to have found out. When I realized the disparity between my character and integrity and the level they should be at, I realized with it that I needed to repent and made all the necessary changes.
Looking back now and seeing the stupidity of my decision, I still think it would have been very difficult to change my companion, yet I see a possibility for a few different solutions. Had I chosen obedience, I could have informed my zone leaders of my concerns and asked them to talk to my companion. Disobedience may not have even been a problem if I had simply chosen to be obedient and keep working hard; my companion may have naturally followed. If he were disobedient still and my zone leaders talked with him, I could have talked to my mission president if problems continued. Overall, I believe that at the time I perceived an external locus of control; I thought that because my companion was going to be disobedient, I had no choice but to do the same. I became aware of the problems I created, the consequences, and my obligations when I realized an absence of the Spirit from my life and when I found myself unhappy and seeking for more disobedience to make me happy. I was blessed to be able to recognize my situation as such and be in a humble enough state to repent and return to the correct path.
I have been blessed with a gut inclined towards righteous living and instincts to choose the right. I go against that gut feeling because of selfishness or a feeling of entitlement and that I owe something to myself. In this ethical decision my gut, along with my heart and soul, were sending up huge red flags that I should not choose disobedience. At the time I was prideful and felt that I had been obedient for a good time, and deserved some “fun”. It didn’t take long for me to realize the error of my ways, humble myself, and put myself back on the correct path.
Looking back on the situation I see how I went against what was ethically right. At the time I either was not aware or blinded myself to the ethical frameworks that one usually considers when making decisions. I was only considering myself, thinking I was entitled to a little “fun” rather than remembering my values, realizing the consequences of my decision, and recognizing my obligations to the Lord and the Filipino people. I hate that I made the wrong decision, and if I could go back I would change it in a second. By analyzing the situation and the ethical frameworks involved, it has helped me to see how making the obedient decision will be easier for me in the future.

To my current employer

2011-03-16T13:47:00.002-06:00

I work right now at the MTC in Provo and have worked there for a little over 2 years. Right now we are undergoing the biggest missionary curriculum change since the discussions were done away with late in 2001. This change is coming about because of lack of teaching skills displayed by the missionaries in the field at this time. It is being spearheaded by the bretheren, however there is some misalignment in the 7 S's model for the MTC in implementing this strategy.

The main goal is to better train missionaries to teach by the Spirit in order to invite others to come unto Christ. The bretheren have identified 8 "Preach My Gospel Fundamentals" that we are to focus on in teaching the missionaries. We teach these fundamentals in the missionaries' native language and mission language later in their MTC stay and have them practice teaching skills. As far as the structure, system, staff, shared values, and skills go, the MTC and all of the teachers seem to be pretty well aligned. We all want the missionaries to be more successful and become more skillful and powerful servants of the Lord. However, in strategy and style there seems to be big misalignment.

Currently I am the tutor for the language I teach, so I don't work with a district directly. I am required to attend 2 different training meetings each led by a different training coordinator. In my tutor training meetings we are taught that in helping the missionaries teach with the Spirit in their mission language, they need to stop worrying about what they are saying and how they are saying it and focus on the Spirit and what the Spirit wants them to say and what the investigator needs to hear. After they do that, the gift of tongues will be given for that missionary and investigator. In my teacher training meetings we're learning the opposite, however. We are taught that as missionaries practice teaching in the mission language they should be focusing on saying everything they want to say correctly. However, depending on the training coordinator leading that teacher training, they also emphasize focusing on the Spirit.

As a result of the misalignment of strategy (different steps leading to the same end result) and style (differing opinions on how to achieve the goal from management) teachers (especially those who are or have served as tutors) are confused on how to best help the missionaries gain the skills they need and teach with the Spirit. I have talked to many of the more tenured teachers and they all agree that they are already sick of this new curriculum and that it is being implemented poorly, causing confusion and frustration for the teachers. Because of this confusion and frustration we as teachers are reverting to whatever we have done in the past and the change is being opposed. We all agree that change needs to happen, we just don't think it can happen like this.

I have talked to a few people and I have an opinion on how to resolve all of this. Granted, I do not have the proper authority to receive the revelation (and I should probably just humble myself and sustain for now, but I haven't been called as a teacher so maybe I'm okay in my rebellious thoughts) but I think it would help solve a lot of problems:

Currently each district in the MTC has 2 teachers to teach them both teaching skills and language principles. there are 3 4-hour blocks in the day for missionaries. 2 of those blocks are used in instruction while the other block is for missionary study. Missionary study is needed and so is instruction, but in my opinion if the missionaries in the field are struggling with teaching, we need to get them to teach more here in the MTC. My idea is to take one of the teachers from every district and turn them into "Progressing Investigators" so that each district every day has 4 hours of instruction, 4 hours of study, and 4 hours of practice teaching. Missionaries can sign up to teach certain teachers as those teachers act as investigators finding the gospel who will have real concerns and pitfalls, just like an investigator would in the field. INstruction hours will focus on the necessary teaching skills and also language. This will help the missionaries rely on the Spirit more in their teaching while getting real-life (or as close to it as possible) practice with the teaching skills in their native language and their mission language when they're ready. Training coordinators will focus their trainings for the "progressing investigators" on how to help the missionary know when they are following the Spirit in teaching while teaching the instructor teachers how to help them gain the language skills and teaching skills in the classroom, and apply them to their progressing investigators.

I've put a lot of thought into this. I think it would solve a lot of frustration from the missionaries, teachers, training coordinators, and even the bretheren. But again, I don't claim to know more than the Bretheren, I just don't know if they've even thought of this possibility yet and I know they don't see the frustration and misalignment of the lowest-level workers: the teachers.

To Apple

2011-02-11T09:09:00.003-07:00

Apple, kudos to you and your iPhone. I still don't own one, but I still envy those who do. Lets take a look at the market for the iPhone...

There are a lot of competitors when it comes to cell phones, but lets face it, no matter what Samsung, LG, HTC, or Blackberry do, they can't seem to match up with the iPhone. There is something special about it. There is definitely the threat of substitutes, but because you've differentiated your iPhone so well, you still dominate. In the past you've put yourself in the position where the iPhone was only available through AT&T, not giving your buyers a lot of power. Millions of people have switched to AT&T just to get the iPhone, and I am among them (though I still don't own one, I switched because of the warm fuzzy feeling I get knowing that I could easily upgrade when funds permit).

Apple, in your iPhone you have resources and capabilities that are very valuable to average consumers and businessmen. You've got the rare stuff that makes you dominant, and you've done SO well that although literally every competitor has tried to imitate and outdo the iPhone, consumers still crave the iPhone.

Although I did recently make the switch to AT&T, I love what you've done by opening the iPhone up for Verizon customers. You're opening yourself up to millions of people you didn't have access to before. Verizon customers no longer have to settle for HTC or Palm phones that don't quite measure up. They will be more than happy to pay for the coveted iPhone. Yes, you've sacrificed a little by giving the customers more buying power, but you really won't feel the consequences of that; AT&T and Verizon will.

You've set yourself up to capture even more market share in an industry where you were already envied. Yes, I am biased, but I have to ask myself: are companies still going to compete to outdo the iPhone, or are they just going to start competing with themselves to settle for 2nd best (as usual)?

To Hulu

2011-01-28T07:56:00.002-07:00

I was gone when you were born, Hulu. As a missionary in the Philippines I had no clue you existed until I got home and decided I needed to catch up on the two years of Lost that I missed.

"What's that? FREE tv shows online? It can't be... I love you Hulu!" That is probably what everyone thought when you started in 2007. You gave the world a way to watch their favorite shows streaming online 24 hours after they premiered on the TV. Your business model was designed by the network bigshots to battle YouTube and take the internet video market by storm. By all accounts you've been very successful. I know you've changed the way I watch TV, and I think I can speak for the millions of others who use you. Over 1.5 BILLION (not a typo) videos were watched on you LAST MONTH and the numbers keep growing. You make your money by advertising. Surely you're making a ton.

You can understand my worry when I open the Wall Street Journal and read that you are considering changing your business model (again), turning yourself into a monthly-subscrition-only site that plays mostly live TV, AKA cable on my computer. To this I hiss and boo and I think it is a poor strategic decision.

The millions who use you monthly use you because we get to watch your shows, that we love and need, on our time table. I love Modern Family, for example, but I NEVER have time on wednesday nights to watch it live on cable. Because of you, I never have to worry about missing a week, though. I know I speak for the masses when I say that I just don't have the resources to be able to tell you that I can sit down in front of my tv or computer at the same time every week to catch a show. Today's world demands flexibility and your new business model will strangle that. By switching to a monthly-subscription setup you will lose millions of users, including me. I would go to Netflix in a heartbeat, because when it comes to subscription video, they dominate (AND they're commercial free, something you probably wouldn't do if you went to subscriptions, and nobody wants to pay to watch commercials on the internet). A subscription makes you the EXACT SAME as cable TV, meaning that people will either dump you for cable (or netflix, or both) or dump cable for you. Either way Hulu (since all you are is a conglomeration of the network hotshots) you're not going to gain many subscribers in the end. People will just choose one or the other.

I know I'm a biased, poor, college student, Hulu, but I think I speak for America when I say you're amazing just the way you are. Don't screw us Americans over just because you all think you're not making enough money as it is. You're doing fine.

To General Motors

2011-01-21T09:10:00.002-07:00

Dear GM and new global product head, Ms. Mary Barra:

I've just been reading today's Wall Street Journal and I noticed that GM has been having some problems. Now, to be completely honest when it comes to American cars I'm pretty loyal to Ford, but I want to put in my two cents that may or may not be insightful for you.

I read that in 2007 40% of your sales came from new or heavily redesigned vehicles. This year you expect that only 12% of your sales will come from the same category of vehicles. I see this as a pretty big problem for you. I'm not very familiar with GM and your base strategy, but it seems to me that recently GM has tried to focus on driving innovation and meeting the demand of drivers everywhere for more efficient and safe vehicles. This drop in percentage of sales of new or heavily redesigned vehicles strikes me as a problem, and it reminds me of a problem another company that I am more familiar with once had: Apple.

Upon founding Apple, the CEO Steve Jobs said that he wanted to change the world through technology and innovation. Recent apparent GM strategy has shown me that this is possibly your goal as well. Like Apple in the 1990's, it seems like you have lost sight of this in recent years. When Steve Jobs came back to Apple in 1997 he made an impactful effort to return to their core strategy. It didn't take long for Apple to refocus this strategy and develop innovative new products that have led them to become the consumer electronic giant that it currently is.

It was once said that Apple was like a boat with a hole in it and a treasure on board with everyone rowing in different directions. The hole to me is the loss of focus on the strategy of innovation and as a result everyone loses their direction. The treasure of course is the potential for huge profitability. I see the same thing beginning with the GM boat in recent years. You are possibly losing focus on your strategy for innovation and people are losing their direction. You, as one of America's great auto makers, have an enormous potential sitting in your boat. To you, Ms. Barra and to the rest of GM, I suggest you plug your hole fast. Refocus on driving auto innovation and showing consumers what is possible with their cars and point the company in the right direction.

Live free, drive hard. Go America.

To 2010

2010-01-18T22:46:00.002-07:00

2010, I gotta say, you've really been impressing me so far.

I know I sounded a bit cynical and pessimistic when I wrote about the new year, but don't worry, I wasn't taking it out on you. I was taking it out on the holiday.

Anyway, thanks 2010 for rocking so far. Classes are going well. They're a bit intense but I think that they'll be helpful and good for me in the long run. I really don't like some of the guys (aka pretty much all the guys but a couple) in my classes because they're punks and think they're all that, but that will be a good learning experience for me too. Overall I'm glad for the classes I'm taking, minus the $706 I spent on books this semester...

The weather has been awesome too. No snow as of yet. Lets keep it that way. At least here in Provo. I actually really want it to snow hard in the mountains every day.

And the reason I want tons of snow in the mountains is the next reason why I love 2010 so far! The return of snowboarding! Ah man I love taking off after doing some homework for a good night of snowboarding with Jeffy-Boy. Snowboarding freakin rocks, and because there has been lots of snowboarding in 2010 so far, you also rock 2010...

All these times I've let out some serious frustrations with dating. 2009 was a strange dating year for me for sure. However... 2010 has turned over a new leaf. Dating has been AWESOME! hahaha. yeah.

Nuf said 2010. You're freakin awesome. Bye.

To New Year's Eve

2010-01-02T00:04:00.002-07:00

First off, New Year's Eve, I don't know how to punctuate you properly. Is it New Years' Eve, New Years Eve, or New Year's Eve? Get on that and let me know...

So, you were yesterday. And I can't pinpoint the exact moment yesterday, but as I was really thinking about it, I realized you pretty much aren't that cool anymore. As a kid, you rocked and I loved it every time you came around because I got to stay up until midnight! I remember Y2K even and I got bored staying up that late because I was playing WWF Smack Down on my N64 all night while listening to the Willenium CD. These days, I go to bed around midnight every night. Your junk food appeal isn't there anymore either because I can eat junk whenever I want! (And I pretty much do).

You're like that kid in elementary school who everyone wants to hang out with at recess because you have the most Pokemon cards until finally someone realizes that you aren't cool anymore and all the sudden its 10 years later and you still have all those Pokemon cards.

You do have the wow factor still of being a new year. More so this last time because we rang in a new decade (which I still haven't decided between "twenty-ten" or "two-thousand ten").

Moral of the story is, New Year's Eve, you're just not that cool and it's about time someone told you. I don't need you to be able to hang out with friends until ridiculous hours of the night, just like I really don't care about that kid's Pokemon cards.

There. It's about time someone said it...

To Christmas Eve

2009-12-24T23:17:00.003-07:00

Through the years, Christmas Eve, you have brought me a lot of fun times. I remember being young and trying and trying to sleep but I never really could. I remember finally, somewhere in the night, drifting off to sleep, but waking up after what seemed only 15 minutes to see if it was morning yet. Finally, once it was about 5:30 am I couldn't take it anymore, at I just sat up and watched the clock until 7:00 (pronounced "seven-oh-oh" in your best little-boy voice) to wake up the rest of the siblings and go bounding into mom and dad's room. There we would wait and wait while they agonized us by saying they didn't want to go out yet or that they had to go to the bathroom or go make sure Santa still wasn't in the living room. I remember my dad going out to get the camera and having us take baby steps down the hall, all the while snapping picture after picture. Great times. My parents did an awesome job of building the hype.

I remember Christmas in the mission. I never wanted to eat spaghetti or buko salad again... Man you fed me a lot on those nights, Christmas Eve.

I remember lots of Christmas Eve's spent watching Christmas movies and going over to our friends, who are now also our family, to read and act out the Luke 2 story and share talents.

Tonight I was a Shepherd.

Christmas eve is full of beautiful sights and sounds, and of course delicious tastes (I've gained 3 pounds since being home, to give you an idea of just how delicious). Tomorrow everyone will wake up and open presents. Tomorrow our thoughts will be on family and Christ as we participate in our traditions. I love it.

I always love Christmas time, but I think I realized this year what it is exactly that makes the Christmas season just so special. It has to be the feast the senses get from the whole season. The cold is refreshing, the smell if just fresh, the tastes are rich, the sights are beautiful, and the smells are full of memory of Christmas past.

Thanks, Christmas. You rock.

To Home

2009-12-23T01:02:00.002-07:00

There is somethin about going home that just makes life awesome. Even though I really don't have any friends at home anymore (except Ashley), I just feel at home at home... (Yeah I know what I said).

On may way back to you, home, I had to wait in Sea-Tac for an hour, but I even loved that! I stepped out of the airport and it was misting outside. Not raining, not sprinkling, but the classic seattle misting. Good thing I had my hoodie on. I fit in much better than those Southwest flyers coming in from Long Beach wearing shorts, sandals, and rain coats and sporting their umbrellas. Psh. Umbrellas are for wussies.

I love being with you, home, because you mean family, and family rocks. I've got the coolest nephew and the 3 cutest nieces in the world and they're all here with us this week. I get to be with my sister and her family and my bro and his wife who is prego. I get to hang out and go to the gym with my little sis who runs like a thousand miles a day. I can't believe how much we've grown, home, and you were always such a big part of that.

Now it pretty much just seems that I really only get to come back every Christmas, when family is here. Otherwise it's just not the same, ya know?

So, home, thanks for everything. Even though you don't provide me with a room anymore and I find myself sleeping on the couch most nights, I love being here. Thanks for the food. Thanks for the family. Thanks for the awesome weather. Thanks for the smells, tastes, sights, and feelings I've loved throughout my life. Seattle's always gonna be home for me.

To Santa

2009-12-12T13:50:00.002-07:00

Dear Santa,

I hope you're doing well. I hope you had a good year and you're finding yourself ready for the holiday season. Crazy how fast it comes, no?

Anyway, Santa, I'm guessing you know all about what this letter is, so I'll get right to it. Here is my Christmas list:

-Underwear. Because the more underwear I have, the less often I have to do laundry, the more money I have.

-iPod speakers or a stereo for the shower so I can express myself in the mornings.

-Snowboard pass for night snowboarding, because I don't want to spend my monday/thursday/friday/saturday nights doing homework.

-Groceries. Cuz I mean, everyone needs to eat, right?

-iTunes money. Never does me wrong.

-Ties and white shirts.

-Homework elf. Yes. I want one of your elves to do my homework.

-8 hours of sleep a night. Or maybe just 2 more hours every day so I can be awake as much as I am now but still sleep 8 hours a day.

-Girlfriend. Complete with diamond ring.

-Dates that are cheap. Or a dating fund. Something to help pay for going on dates with that girlfriend.

-Textbooks. Or a college degree.

-A summer internship. Paid hopefully. Either in Provo or Seattle.

-Acceptance letter to the UW MHA program.

And of course...

-Peace on Earth.

Love ya, Santa. I know you can come through.

To Dating

2009-12-05T20:07:00.002-07:00

You sure are a fickle friend, dating. It is definitely a love/hate relationship. I definitely enjoy your company, yet sometimes I just don't want anything to do with you. All in all, you're awesome. I just have a few questions for you dating...

I don't have any problems with trying to ask a girl to hang out with you one time... but how do I do it the second time with that same girl? I mean, how do I know if she's interested? How do I know when I can ask? Do I have to go on dates with some other girls first? What do you do on a second date? I don't even know what the girl is thinking at this point!

One thing I've noticed too is that you don't seem to be too keen on entertaining groups of more than 4, sometimes 6. Why is this? I know often times it gets a little weird for me, especially on a first date because it gets super hard to even get to know the girl I'm with. Maybe I just shouldn't do the group date thing... I dunno... You tell me what you want.

How do I know when to end you? Not meaning to stop dating, but how do I know when the date has gone too long? Actually, come to think of it, I think I know when you last too long, the question is how do I end it? Thats the tricky thing because if I end a date before curfew the girl might think she's a bad date or I just want to be doing other things. If I don't, the date could get boring or something. It's just tricky.

How do I make you cheap? I try, but just can't do it.

Thanks for being fun at least, dating. You're a good friend, even though I don't understand how you work sometimes.

To Thanksgiving Break again

2009-11-28T23:40:00.003-07:00

Thanksgiving Break, I sure am thankful for you. Even after you're over, I'm so glad you were there for me. My plans for you as discussed in my previous letter? Didn't pan out so well...

First off I said I would pass the 14 hour drive with sleeping, reading, and listening to music. No reading got done, and not even that much sleeping because I spent most of the ride with a pretty killer headache. Thank goodness for that great man Dr. Pepper. Without him I don't think I would have started you out well at all, break. I think I said I was going to read a whole lot of Harry Potter while enjoying you... I didn't. I maybe read 10 pages. I believe I also said I would hammer out a lot of homework. Well... Lets just say I still have the 14 hours in the car on the way back to Utah to hammer that out... As for the BYU-Utah game. Thank you for providing such a great game. However, I didn't see a single second of it. I actually spent all Saturday at the UW-WSU game watching UW trounce the Courgars and our TV blacked out the Y game for some reason so I couldn't even TiVo it.

I did spend a lot of time with Ashley, which rocked my world. She and I made some life changing decisions for me and a few other people. We also probably greatly confused my extended family and they most likely think I brought home a sugar momma to introduce to my parents. Love ya, Ashley! haha.

All in all I have loved spending you, my 2nd favorite break, at home for the first time in five years. I'm tired now, so I'm going to enjoy the next five hours of sleep before I spend the last 14 hours of you in a car putting off all that homework until monday.

To Thanksgiving Break

2009-11-21T23:51:00.002-07:00

Thanksgiving break, thanks for always being there. Year after year. You've always been my 2nd favorite break. You probably always will be 2nd. Never 1st. Christmas will always be first. I just wanted to write this letter to let you know what I'm planning on doing with you this year.

First off, as good as you've been to me, you haven't brought me home for thanksgiving in 5 years. This year, however, you're letting me. Thanks for that. So I plan on going home, taking the 14 hour car ride with a few people I barely know. I'll probably end up reading Harry Potter, listening to music, and sleeping most of the way. It'll be awesome. One I get home on Wednesday night I'll probably hang out with my sister then fall asleep after spending too much time not doing homework and projects for school.

Thursday will be awesome. Full of doing nothing but playing on the Wii and eating food. I'll be hangin out with Ashley most of the day probably too (Holla!). Friday I'll probably finally buckle down and do all my work that I'm supposed to do. Saturday I'll probably do the same, watch the BYU-Utah game on my TV (most likely with Ashley again, Holla!), and then maybe go out for a Saturday night on the town. Sunday I get in the car and read more Harry Potter, listen to more music, and catch up on more sleep. Sleep I probably missed from the night before while I was hangin out with Ashley (Boo yah).

Love ya, turkey break!

To girls

2009-11-14T23:35:00.002-07:00

So, girls. How are you doing? I'm doing well. I wanna say thanks first off for being so awesome. Most of the time you really rock. You're fun, you're good looking, and you're quite nice. Not to mention clean.

Sometimes however, you make life hard. It's so hard to know what you're thinking. Ever. I don't know if you're interested. I don't know if I can ask you out. I know most of the time I can ask you out once, but I have no clue if I can go for 2. Sometimes I figure I can go for it then you tell me no.

This isn't a letter of frustration by any means don't worry cuz I really think in general you're awesome. Just try to make our lives, as guys who are just trying to find someone and be happy, a little easier. Thanks! That's all I got for now.

To T-Pain

2009-11-07T22:23:00.002-07:00

Dear T-Pain,

You're pretty much my hero and definitely the highlight of my week. I may be a little slower on finding out about all these things, but I found 3 amazing videos you're associated with, all of which have made my week worthwhile.

First is "On a Boat" with Lonely Island. So funny. Vulgar as it may be, it still makes me laugh every time I see it. I especially love the end when you're dancing and singing. its just ridiculous. What's more, I can't believe you were on a boat. That is pretty cool.

The second video is the one of you where your "I am T-Pain" app was featured on the Jimmy Kimmel show and he explained how the app can take anyone's voice and turn it into one of your songs. I didn't believe it at first, but you definitely pulled it off with Obama speaking on health care. Doctors, patients, amputation... just makes me laugh every time.

Finally my favorite has to be the video of you and Taylor Swift rapping... I do call her T-Sweezy now.

Daily viewings of these videos really helped me through this week and probably will help me through several weeks to come. Keep puttin out big youtube hits, T-Pain. We love you.

To Halloween

2009-10-31T19:22:00.002-06:00

I like candy. I like the night. I like to party. Halloween, I don't know where you came from, but thanks for being here. Because you rock Halloween, I need to thank you for some awesome Halloween memories I have from the past.

First off is your song. I remember all through elementary school we sang the song that goes, "H-A-double L-O-W-double E-N spells HALLOWEEN!" In fact, for some reason the music teacher we had thought she had to teach us that same song every year. Not sure if she realized we remembered it from the previous year. Maybe our class teachers told her how bad we were at spelling. I don't know. Either way I love that song still and it's stuck in my head right now.

Next memory comes from the dinners I always had at home before going trick or treating. Macaroni and cheese with hotdogs in it. I think pretty much every year. As we were eating my dad always tried to be as scary as possible too. He was pretty scary. Not in the way he was going for, but he was scary.

Oh man, the things you have made me dress up as in the past, Halloween... A Ninja Turtle like 2 or 3 times, Jason, a pimp, and a die. Yes, a die. No, not die as in dead. Die as in dice. My brother and I were dice. I think one of my dad's bad puns was behind that.

All the candy, all the calories, and yet, no cavities caused by you. Thanks, Halloween!

To the bag boy at Smiths...

2009-10-24T20:44:00.001-06:00

Okay, so this is in response to the assignment Shayne gave us.

I went to the store today and decided that for the assignment I should buy someone a gallon of milk. I was going to try to do is strategically too so that I could get it to someone who looked like they really needed it. I planned my timing in line for check-out and it was perfect. A poor older gentleman got in line behind me clutching foodstamps and a gallon of milk. I got to the front of the line and the checker started checking my items. I leaned over to the bag boy and told him that the gallon of milk I bought was for the man behind me and that when I walked out he needed to give it to him and tell him it was from me. He signaled to me that he understood. He winked even. It was great! I felt awesome. Here I was helping someone out with something they really needed. I pay for my groceries and head out to my car. I get in my car and start driving off just in time to see the man who was in line behind me come out... not with the gallon that I bought for him. The bag boy blew it. I don't know how, but he did. I mean, he winked at me signaling he knew the plan! I hope someone got that gallon of milk. If not, at least Smiths can resell it so I got to help them.

Sorry I didn't get to do the cool thing, Shayne. Maybe next time.

Another...

2009-10-22T23:02:00.000-06:00

Game winning goal with 42 seconds left... Is it bragging yet?

To Boy Scouts

2009-10-17T20:04:00.003-06:00

So, Boy Scouts, I have some advice for all of you. Before I give you this advice I need to tell you all about a roommate whom I will just call J. Schwarting for now. Perhaps that's too obvious so I'll just call him Jeff S. Point is, he is my roommate, and there are some lessons tone learned from him.

Now that I think about it this more this is going to have to be a multi-part epistle. Today then I teach two important lessons by way of a story.

Jeff is the king of doing stupid stuff. Sometimes we, as Jeff's roommate, sometimes encourage him to do dumb stuff. One morning after about 14 minutes of being awake we talked him into deep frying a twinky and a marshmellow for breakfast. He filled the frying pan with oil and got started with heating it up. For some reason he wanted to check how hot the oil was by flicking a few drops of water in it. Well nothing happened and so Jeff thought that maybe he would check how hot it was by putting a quarter cup of water in it. Well, we all told him it was a bad idea (cuz we draw the line at arson) but he is a pretty stubborn kid. So he put the water in the hot oil. Guss what happened next... Yup. The oil popped and splashed onto our burner, catching fire. Then of course the oil in the pan caught fire. The flames were burning the ceiling. Smoke filled the apartment. We had ourselves a grease fire. By some crazy stoke of luck the fire only lasted like 15 seconds and somehow nothing got burned. However, there are burn marks on our ceiling and there was oil everywhere. Then we walked over and turned off the stove.

So that's the background. Lesson one, don't try to get your buddies who do dunh things to do dumb things. Lesson two- and listen to this all you Boy Scouts cuz I know you all like fire- don't put water in hot oil.

Pretty easy. Just don't do it.

A short question

2009-10-10T13:24:00.001-06:00

Is it bragging for me to say on here I scored 5 goals today in my soccer game?

To the Little Robby in All of Us

2009-10-10T09:12:00.002-06:00

So when I was a little kid my parents always used to have some cute little-kid nicknames for me like Roberto, Robby-B, Sport, etc. I don't know why but for some reason it seems like a bit of that little kid has come out in me this past week and I was kinda hoping to get a little bit of that out of all four of you who will read my blog. I'm probably gonna reveal a lot about myself and how strange I was as a child (not saying that I changed much) but hopefully some of you can relate.

Remember playing with Marble Works? Maybe you have but you just can't remember. It was this toy set made up of a bunch of plastic pieces that you could assemble any which way to build vertically and create the world's coolest gravity-induced marble races (that's right, gravity induced. That means its green!). I remember saturday and sunday mornings spent with my older brother and sister trying to make the coolest marble-race tracks ever! I always made the coolest ones. The green marbles, which were mine, always won too. I remember getting upset when I lost or when my brother or sister wanted to change one of the race elements that I would throw a fit and just run everything over. That was awesome. Then K'nex came along with their big ball machine and the marble works never came out from under the stairs again. I don't think I ever figured out how to make that one right...

Sunday afternoons as a little tyke were always a delight. They consisted of making forts (again with my siblings), watching the old animated Book of Mormon Stories videos (The Tree of Life was by far the best one cuz Nephi saves that guy from falling into the hot chocolate river), and eating chocolate chip cookies. After the video I always used to love sitting in the fort and try to find where Waldo is or spy that sneaky Nephite and his buddies. The fort was by far the coolest part, but again I remember when my brother or sister wanted something I didn't I always decided it would be best to ruin it for everyone by standing straight up and just demolishing the fort.

Four-on-four soccer games where only about 3% of the soccer field would be used at one time. Boys' and Girls' Club basketball where even 7 foot hoops weren't low enough most times. Little League Night at the Kingdome and free Griffey shirts. Team Parties at Round Table Pizza and wasting all my money on that dang Simpsons arcade game.

Power Rangers. Yup. My brother and I used to pretend that we were Power Rangers. And I know what you're thinking, "Yeah, so did everyone else" but no... We made up our own Power Rangers and dinosaurs to go with it. My bro had an amethyst that he used as his morphing rock. For some reason he wanted to be a purple ranger, which I always thought was girly as a kid, but mine wasn't much better. I had an old lava rock and I was the maroon ranger... One time at our great aunt's house we couldn't figure out how to turn off the TV and Tales from the Crypt was on so we pretended like we were fighting that creepy skeleton guy who hosts it... (This is getting more embarrassing than I thought it would)

I used to wake up super early as a kid. Like 6:00 am every day. I would go and wake up my parents right away until they told me I couldn't wake up until 7:00. I still woke up at 6 but I would go out and sit on the kitchen floor and watch the microwave clock (the only digital clock we had at the time) until it read "seven-oh-oh" and I would run into my parents' room and jump on the bed between them. Those were the types of times that our moms or dads would say "I love you this much!" and hold out their arms as wide as they could. I never thought that was fair since I was so much smaller than them, so I found a way to one up them. I pinched my fingers together as tight as possible and said "I love you this much!" Of course my parents would get sad at first but I was a smart kid and I knew the world was round so I explained that what I meant was that it went around the world connecting my two fingers, forming a circle. Then they felt better.

*Sigh* how I wish life was still that simple. How I wish I could just go back and do it all again. Yeah life is good now, but life is also scary sometimes. Decisions have to be made and sometimes it's confusing knowing what it best or what God wants for you. Why can't life's biggest difficulties just go back to finding Waldo's blasted shoe that he lost on the last page...

To Apple

2009-10-03T11:59:00.002-06:00

Well, you've done it. You've amazed me again, Apple. I remember that first you amazed me with the iMac when I was but a wee lad. It was hip and cool and colorful. It happened again when I was in high school and you gave us iTunes and the iPod. I fell in love with my first iPod. I was one of the first people I know to get one. I used it for a good four years before going on my mission. After getting home of two years in the Philippines I was blown away by the iPhone, MacBook pro, and other fancy stuff you had to offer. Well now again I am impressed. I just purchased your new iPod touch and after enduring the delays of a global supply chain have been putting it to good use. In fact, I'm writing this thank you letter right now from the comfort of my living room floor. The touch display is impressive. The operating system, commendable. The apps just make me happy. It is so big yet so small at the same time. Thanks for this great new innovative product. I expect more great things out of you and I know you won't disappoint.

To Kneaders

2009-09-26T21:57:00.002-06:00

Kneaders,

Hey, how's it going? How is business? I pretty much wanna say thanks and thats about it.

First, thanks a ton for breakfast. I really can't think of anything that I would rather eat in the later hours of the morning than there at your establishment. The french toast is awesome. It isn't only the french toast that brings me there in the morning. You also provide a great chance to get together with friends who are really busy at night usually.

Second, thanks for the turkey bacon avocado sandwich on focaccia bread. Wow. It's good. I have to say that honestly it is the best turkey sandwich I've ever had.

Finally, thanks for the quote.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing" -Edmund Burke

Thanks.

To the MTC

2009-09-19T21:49:00.002-06:00

Hey MTC. First off I wanna say thanks for being there. Thanks for being there to employ me as one of your teachers, but mostly thanks for being there for missionaries to learn and grow and stuff before they go serve the Lord.

I'm having trouble working through a mental debate I'm having with myself, so I figured I'd turn to you for your advice and help.

Being a student at BYU is fun and tough, especially in the business program. My classes this semester have me working hard, but also have me thinking about whether or not I should really be working there with you. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do. I love being a part of the missionaries' lives and helping them prepare to invite people to come unto Christ. I love being able to teach Tagalog to people. It definitely helps to keep me sharp on my language skills. Only thing is, I've been thinking lately that as much as I love working with the missionaries, I really don't know how much my job is helping me with my career in business.

I need the job to help me to pay for school and what not. I especially want to try to avoid any student loans if possible. Yet, at the same time I think that perhaps by quitting my job I can focus on things that will help me advance my career opportunities. All this meaning that even if I do take on debt, a better career offered by better focus on that now provides a higher opportunity cost.

I just don't know what to do. What do you think?

To the Mariners

2009-09-12T21:14:00.002-06:00

I know this is too early for an end of season thank you letter, Seattle Mariners, but thank you.

First off, thank you for playing good baseball and really showing the world that yes, Seattle can still compete in sports. We don't just roll over and die in everything these days. Thanks for giving us a good effort and putting up a (soon to be hopefully) winning season.

Mostly I just want to say thank you to you, Mariners, for resurrecting my hero, Ken Griffey Junior. He is the best player I have ever seen play the game. I grew up watching him. I sometimes even think of him as my second father. He was the heart and soul of the Mariners my entire childhood, and watching him go all those years ago was one of the saddest days of my life. He leaves Seattle, and his career is plagued by injury. It is sad. He probably would have been the best player of this generation and one of maybe 5 pure sluggers in the game. Thanks for bringing Ken back to the house that Junior built. I love watching him. Tears well up in my eyes every time I hear that announcer say "Now batting, Keeeennn Griffeeeeeeeyyyy JUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNIIOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!" Some say he didn't do much for the team this year because of his batting average. I say he saved the team completely this year. Not just the team, but the city. He brought us back to Safeco. He reminded us (and probably the team too) of what baseball is all about. That big smile put smiles on millions.

Thanks, Mariners, for a great season. I know your playoff hopes are shot this year. Best of luck next year. Sodo Mojo. My Oh My. Refuse to lose.

To Provo

2009-09-05T22:10:00.003-06:00

I'm a student at Brigham Young University. Owned by the LDS church, BYU is tucked away at the feet of the Wasatch Mountains 50 miles south of Salt Lake City in a little college town called Provo. BYU is Provo. 99 out of 100 people you meet here are mormon. Most of which are BYU students or BYU alum. There are hundreds of congregations that meet for Sunday worship while the rest of the town is dead and even fast food chains are closed for the day.

Now you might think, being a college town, that Provo might have a lot to offer in the way of things to do for a college student (us crazy mormons!). Well, believe it or not you're wrong. It pretty much sucks living here 99% of the time because all there is to do is watch TV or movies and try to escape the fact that we are actually living in the nexus of the boredom universe. A crazy night on the town is usually topped off with bowling up on State street's famous Miracle Bowl.

But somehow, tonight, I love Provo. This fall has started no different than any, with the town holding its breath as the long awaited college football season begins and we all wonder... "how are the cougs gonna hold up this year?" We opened our season tonight ranked #20 facing off against the Heisman winning Sam Bradford and the #3 Sooners at the "neutral stadium" of the Dallas Cowboys in Arlington, Texas, and somehow we won. This isn't necessarily why I love Provo tonight, because we win often nowadays. I love Provo right now because the town went absolutely crazy after the win.

2 hours after the final whistle traffic was backed up on all the streets, crazy mormon college kids were running around the streets jumping on cars driven by old ladies and screaming in victory. Honking cars crowded the parking lot of the stadium as thousands did nothing but yell into the night. I couldn't have imagined anything close to that happening here, even if BYU had won the national championship or Obama had been shot.

The time is now 10:32, and the crowds are starting to die down. Any other college town and we would be off drinking our livers to hell and probably getting laid. None of that here. We have church in the morning.

To the world

2009-09-03T16:22:00.002-06:00

My name is Rob, and I'm from Seattle.

I attend school at Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah. I'm sure you'll be hearing lots about me and Provo in my following epistles. Not that I have anything against BYU, it's just that I have something against Provo. After all, I'm from Seattle.

In case you were wondering, yes, I am a Mormon. Hence my Biblical reference in the name of my blog. And I just thought it was clever. I served as a Mormon missionary (yes the 19-20 year old boys who walk around in suits and parted hair) in Manila, Philippines. Expect to be hearing more about that and my experience there too.

This is my first attempt at blogging. It was given to us as an assignment for my business writing course at BYU, but I'm actually really excited about this. I'm going to mainly use this to express my thoughts and opinions in letter format (mostly) to either an individual or an organization. Some may be angry, some may be funny, and, like it or not, some may be offensive. This is my brain. This is how it works. I'm not worried about it. You shouldn't be either.

I hope I write something interesting or worthwhile somewhere down the line.